Sunday, February 27, 2011

Remember to log out of blogger!

I managed to not log out of blogger. Which is nothing out of the ordinary. I have nothing to hide so it doesn't bother me if my hubby decides to read it. He has his own blog for crying out loud. Besides our marriage doesn't have secrets. I have no desire to hide anything from him. The shocking part is my daughter was reading the blogs I follow. While she is stayed away from the ones with curse in the title she did read a couple she had to click the over age button on!
The blogs she read (and fucking understood!) led me to an hour long conversation about marriages. While I do not judge others for what they do in their marriages I will not have my daughters view of marriage tainted. To each their own. What ever makes them happy.
My sweet innocent daughter asked me a couple of hard questions. Mommy what is an affair? Mommy if someone gets married why would they want someone else? Don't people get married when they love each other? Mommy my daddy had affairs didn't he? Did daddy know these women?
All of these questions left me floored but I couldn't leave them fucking unanswered! So I took a deep breath and took the head first dive into answers fit for her age.
Sweetie, affairs are when you have sexual relations with someone other then your husband or wife. Yes, you are taught that marriage is special and so is your body. You marry someone who loves you. Mommy and daddy fell apart because of affairs and because mommy and daddy couldn't get along anymore. No the people on my blog list don't know daddy. I tried to skirt around the why would they have an affair question, but she is smart. So in the end I told her people have affairs when their spouse don't treat them right. 
Of course she had the usual comebacks. You were good to daddy, what about their children, what is God gonna say about that, and my fave... I love my daughter being so damn smart! What if they catch AIDS and STD's? This tells me she has listened to our talks! 
I then had to tell my daughter that just because I read blogs and women are having affairs that doesn't mean mommy does. I would never cheat on Nate. I know how it feels to be cheated on. I know how it feels to be the other woman in my own marriage, and I know how much it broke me in half.  
So now she doesn't want to get married ever. She doesn't want to be broken hearted and she is going to live with me forever! I told her not everyone does these things, but to her she has seen it personally. Now she has read it. At some point she would have found out that people do these things. I just wish it was a little later. 
So from now on I will be logging out of blogger and proving to my daughter that marriage is a wonderful thing that is full of love.
I will just enjoy that fact that she will be living with me forever until she falls in love and then it will be see you mommy! I hope that doesn't happen for at least 30 years!


THUNDERCAT832 said...

Those hard questions you answered for your daughter are ones that I have a problem answering for myself! This post was really deep for me!

Jen Sparkles said...

I never thought I would have to adress those questions with her. Sorry if it offended anyone. It was way to deep for me at that time of the night, but she felt better today with my explanation. This is a tough subject for me. It's full of pain and bad memories.